"Lost Beast" Sign & Collar

The sale on the fake chain was too good to pass up - $1 per 6' section.  I had no idea what I'd do with it but sure, 6 sections should do it.

Months of porch swing brain storming passed.  I contemplated attaching them to the roof line and then down, like a drawbridge of sorts.  A fine enough idea but I knew I could do better. 

Inspiration finally hit, as it usually does, in July.  Long warm nights + cold beers is a ancient and quality recipe for creative juice.   What if the chain was holding back some massive creature that was being kept as a pet at the haunt?  And what if that creature... had gotten loose?!?!?!

A "loose" creature meant I didn't need to fabricate the "beast" itself, I mean, where would I store it?!  All I needed was the chain, a collar the "beast" had broken free from and a sign that would help visitors put the pieces of the puzzle together.

I found used 15' of 4" polypropylene strapping (sold by the foot) and giant tree spikes.  The strapping would need to be folded in half and glued together to make it sturdier, so I only attached the spikes to one side, spacing them out equally.  I folded and glued the strap together, leaving a loop open at the fold for the "buckle" (A large U-bolt serves as the "buckle.")  Remember, the beast broke loose so this buckle itself didn't need to be functional but rather just look buckle-y.

The finished product in a less than flattering location:

For the sign I mocked up something on my computer and took it to a local print shop I love and had it printed up on PVC so it would last outside.  The "beast" needed to be non-specific so I went with a low angle shot on one of those wonderful dogs that always wins "Ugly Dog" competitions.  They're so interesting and resemble various animals which felt very "beast" like to me.  I tweaked the color a bit to make it a bit more "off" and included some helpful info.  Here's the basic sign, the print shop did the fantastic aged background effect.

The first year it was out, a young boy and his dad were riding their bikes to trick-or-treat.  After getting their treat bag & candy, they paused to read the sign.  As they did, the boys eyes widened and at the end, he looked at his dad with pure panic.  He peddled off as fast as those 11 year old legs could carry him, hoping to dodge whatever this creature was that was somewhere, out there, lurking in the dark of our fine neighborhood.

35 days till Halloween...

(blurry pick but what else would you expect?)

Pantry Potion: Antiquing Wood - Steel Wool vs. SOS Pads

There's a lot of information and how-to's on antiquing wood using vinegar and steel wool.  It's a really cool trick that's cheap and easy with simple household items - the perfect DIY project.

All the info out there concurs one critical point - SOS Pads don't work as well. Some will straight up tell you they DON'T work and not to use them.

Funny thing, SOS Pads are all I had ever used.  I guess the first tutorial I used years ago didn't mention this fact or I overlooked it.  If memory serves - which it often doesn't - they may have actually used an SOS Pad as I have vague memories of a picture of that easily identifiable blue pad sitting in a jar of vinegar.

Regardless, I needed to antique some wood for my Gothic Window and that's when I came upon all the SOS Pad warnings and chuckled.  All my crates look rad if you ask me.  Could there really be that much of a difference?  Time for an experiment.

Before we begin, the basic antiquing recipe:   Fill a jar with white vinegar and plop steel wool inside.  Let it sit.  An hour or weeks, whatever.  The longer the murkier the liquid will get but honestly this works after a few hours, too.  Then you just "paint" the liquid on using either a paint brush or the pad itself.  Wear gloves, this stuff gets messy.

The recipes all call for some tea as well.  I let loads of bags sit for a long time in a separate container, sometimes even adding coffee grounds.  Since I'm going for creepy crate vs wine crate it doesn't have to be perfect.

One note of caution with the SOS Pad: the blue soap can clump and stick to spot leaving blue stains.  Use the tea/coffee solution to water these areas down and disperse/diminish the blue.

I like to do a base of the vinegar/pad solution and let that dry.  After that, it's the perfect science of slop a little of either or both, just let it go and feel it.  Become one with the crate.

On the left, we have the SOS Pad crate and on the right, the Steel Wool Crate.  Here we are after the first coat of solution.  Having never done a pure steel wool one I was blown away with how fast it works!  It gets dark FAST.  Which is cool especially if you're going for more of a wine crate look.  I did the SOS Pad one first so it's been sitting for about 20 minutes when I took this photo:

Pretty crazy, right?  Almost looks like I haven't done anything to the one on the left.  I meant to take a "before" picture but my 3 year old daughter made a mad dash from her bedroom, out the backdoor and then down the driveway which, big surprise, distracted me every so slightly.  My apologies, would have been nice to have a baseline.  Next time.

After a while I came back and did another coat to the SOS pad as well as some tea to both.  The Steel Wool crate was pretty well stained at that point so I wasn't able to have as much fun creating irregularities with it.  I probably should have gone back and forth between tea and vinegar solution on the first coat.  

I did one final coat on the SOS pad one, just finishing off the liquid and added tea as well.  I did another round on the steel wool one as well trying to layer it up in some areas to create greater depth.

Left them overnight and the final result....?

You can absolutely antique wood with an SOS pad.  They're almost identical with the SOS pad leaving the crate a greyish brown and the steel wool creating a deep reddish brown.

I prefer the look of the SOS Pad.  I think it works far better for a haunted house as it's less "winery wedding" and more "witch's storage."  Whatever you wind up using at least now you know you have options and an SOS pad isn't steel wool's less crafty sibling.

Which crate do you prefer?

(in this light you can hardly tell them apart)

(Such a subtle difference)

(the end of the SOS crate didn't take the solution as well this time, but who can tell at night?)

UPDATE!!!

It's now been 3 days and the difference is even more pronounced.  The SOS Pad has deepened it's grey/brown color all over while the steel wool one is more red toned than ever.  Perhaps it's an illusion but there you go, can we just admit that and SOS pad not only works but also looks killer?!?

The difference is crazy! (SOS on left, Steel Wool on right)

Pumpkin Bushes

The two round bushes at either side of the end of my sidewalk had been calling to me for years for the perfect Halloween costume.  I had wrapped them in spiderwebs and covered them in pipe cleaner spiders for a bit which was fine.   Hours of porch swing brainstorming were spent solely on these two bushes.

Maybe I had paid my dues in swings and beers because finally, it hit me - these giant round bushes were screaming out to be giant round lit up pumpkins!

Easy peasy.  Strands of orange string lights wrapped vertically create the ribs of the rind.  A shorter strand of green string lights wrapped around a tomato cage for the stem.  Wrap some green electrical tape at various spot on your "stem" to secure the lights.  Just stick the stakes of the cage down into the bush for stability and bam!  Giant lit up pumpkin bush.  I can see these, glowing in the distance, when I turn the corner on my way home in the evenings and oh how it makes me cackle.

Nothing would make me happier than one day to see Pumpkin Bushes across American.  When I drive around, I see people's bushes and want to knock on their door to see if they'll let me pumpkin-fy their shrubbery.  My good friend lives in a neighborhood that closes the streets to accommodate 1000's of trick-o-treaters.  He has the most perfect 2 bushes.  He may just wake up one day in October with two giant lit pumpkins in his front yard.  Halloween magic!

44 days 'til Halloween...

Check out 2019's first bush!

*** If you love this... hot tip, during Xmas wrap your bushes in red & white lights to make peppermints that would make Willy Wonka drool***

Halloween Creeping In...

The itch hits me early.  I can usually stave it off with some DIY prop making and porch brainstorming time.

Eventually it takes over and I'm Ashley Judd in "Bug."  The calamine lotion to my paresthesia - spookifiying the space above the kitchen cabinets.  I can secretly be Halloween behind closed doors, my neighbors none the wiser and unable to shake their heads as they have come to do over the years.

A few years back I had seen a piece on a morning show about decorating the space above the cabinets.  The guy had collected various vintage Halloween decorations for his display.  So gorgeous and vintage stuff can be just spectacular and bizarre.

My display has grown steadily since.  I like to stick with one color palate as well as items made from metal or ceramic.  By avoiding over stylized items or "look of the year" type things, these more classic items avoid it looking dated as time passes.  Better to invest in something that will still look great years from now so you can really build up the display.

There's a lot of great ideas out there.  I love this Witch's Hats display.   Make Hitchcock proud with a flock of crows.  Branches spray painted black are great for mantles as well as setting the scene above your cabinets.

Remote control LED Flameless candles are the only way to go of course.  If you're like me, you may only have to change to batteries once or twice depending on how often their lit (in my case, nearly 24/7).  I love these, these, these and these.

What will the Halloween goblins leave in your kitchen?

45 days till Halloween...

Pumpkin Carving Tips

Averaging 25+ carved pumpkins a year one is bound to figure out some short cuts and tricks to making it an easier, more enjoyable experience.  Often I've learned the hard way - you can't believe the rash one develops around their forearm gutting out dozens of gourds.  So here I am, to save you some sweat, tears and strangers concerned about your level of contagiousness.

Before we get started, let's talk tools.  The pumpkin saws available with kits are pretty great but have a pretty wide spread in quality.  Look for one's that have a sturdier looking handle and blade paying particular attention to the where they connect and if it's a strong bond.  The carving action can cause the low quality one's to bend as you saw eventually causing the blade to snap at the handle.  It may cost you a few bucks more but it's worth it.

You'll need:

Pumpkin Saw
Large metal spoon
Crazy sharp knife

Here's my kit:

The crazy sharp knife is just for cutting the tops.  Dull knives are far scarier for this process as the rind of some varieties of pumpkins can be tough to get through.  A good sharp knife gets you through this initial phase faster and safer.  I found this one at Smart & Final 2 decades ago.  I have never sharpened it and it could still cut through a tin can.

I'm pretty sure the spoon is a Chinatown purchase but it may also have come from Smart & Final.  It's the perfect pumpkin scooping spoon as it's edge, while not actually sharp, is able to "cut" the pumpkin guts from the pulp.   One of those "cheaper is better" products at least for what we need it for.

As for the pumpkin saw, I primarily use the long blade with the black & orange handle from a kit I bought at Lombardi Ranch many years ago before they closed.  It's extremely well made so I never worry about the blade snapping off.  The other two with green handles are well made and have smaller blades for the smaller details. 

And now, onto the tips...


Tip 1: Smoke hole - it goes without saying you should cut a hole in the lid of the pumpkin if you're going to use a real candle.  Take it a step further and cut a matching hole in the pumpkin itself.  Now you'll never have to guess which way the lid fits.

Tip 2: Cleaned & Gutted - getting the guts out can be annoying.  I like using a metal rice spoon similar to these.  I've found them at Smart & Final, Big Lots & Dollar Tree stores.  The cheaper one's seem to work better.  The guts tend to have a connecting point dead center bottom (called the Blossom End) that is a good place to start.  Grip the spoon close to where the neck & bowl meet and used the edge to "cut" this away from the flesh/pulp.  Then, starting at the bottom, continue to scrape the fibrous strands where they connect with the flesh, rotating the pumpkin and working your way up as you go.  This technique should cause the guts to accumulate in the middle in one big clump.  Flip the pumpkin over and it "should" just plop right out.

Tip 3: Keep 'em cool - here in LA it's pretty impossible to keep a carved pumpkin more than 48 hours before it starts to mold and collapse.  If you have the space, pop the pumpkins in the fridge during the day to keep them fresh.

Tip 4: Keep em' moist - congratulations, you got me to use my least favorite word.  Moist.  Ugh.  Anyway.  After carving, I rub petroleum jelly or use veggie oil on the exposed areas.  This helps trap in the moisture (ugh, again!) and maintain the shape, especially those finer details that tend to dry out faster than others.

Tip 5: Stop the rot - mix a little bit of bleach with water in a spray bottle and spray all the exposed areas after carving.  Give it a fresh "bath" every day or so.  This will keep it moist (kill me now) but more importantly, will delay mold growth.

Tip 6: Bath time! After I carve I like to submerge my pumpkins in a bucket of water and let them soak for about 10 minutes.  The gourd absorbs some of the water, giving it some life and it helps remove any strands and loose pieces leaving you with a nice clean Jack-o'-Lantern.

Tip 7: What big eyes you have! Something about a pumpkin turns everyone into a sculptor.  And that's great.  I'll never get between someone and their art.  The results can be spectacular.  However, they're only really appreciated up close and with ample time to admire.  I have found a basic formula is most effective = big eyes + big mouth = big impact.  Most visitors experience your pumpkin from afar so the larger the features the higher the visability.  Also, if you're doing a whole bunch of pumpkins, you can crank these out a lot faster than carefully peeling the rind off a pumpkin with a carrot peeler to get a "cool layered effect."  (Note: when friends come to help me carve their inner artist has flourished so you'll notice some of these fancier pumpkins in some of my pics.  Gotta give credit where credit is due.)

Tip 8: Foster Imposters - If you really want to go to town with loads and loads of pumpkins, mix carved craft pumpkins in with real ones.  Use an Xacto knife to carve your favorite designs into assorted size and shape craft pumpkins available at most craft stores.  This can be done during the boring, non-Halloween, part of the year.  The part I like the most is that I can put these out October 1 and have carved & lit pumpkins all month long!  The trick here is the LED candle - they are often dark or have a funny colored light which causes them to stand out against a real pumpkin/candle combo.  After many purchases and returns, I have found one I am really happy with and highly recommend.  And they're remote control!

(before I found the good flameless candles)

Tip 9: Pumpkin Posterity - What to carve?!  One asks themselves, pen poised, ready to draw on their selected gourd, hovering for an eternity as they wait for inspiration to smack them upside the head.  Meanwhile, I have 15 pumpkins to carve so I've busted out 2 before the first pen stroke slides across rind.  How?  Because I just pulled up my "pumpkin" file on my computer and scrolled through the pics from previous years.  Super original no but honestly, who from last year is going to remember anyway?  And if they do, it's often because the liked the design.  I also like to save images I see online or on TV for future pumpkins.  What I'm saying is, make a catalog and get to carving already.

Tip 10: A Charlie Brown Pumpkin - Charlie Brown picked the saddest, least perfect tree on the lot and it was glorious.   With genetic farming taking over and stores looking to buy & sell only the most perfect pumpkins, it can get rather boring.  The giant bins of pumpkins that are all EXACTLY the same are freaky and unnatural.  But what can you do, sometimes this is the only place to get pumpkins.  If you don't have a farm pumpkin patch near you, I've found each store tends to buy from a different grower.  While all the Vons pumpkins may be round and exactly 12" in diameter, Trader Joe's will have bought a different variety that is a different color and size.  Smart & Final tends to hook me up with the tall, oblong one's.  If you have the time, it's worth the separate trips.  If you're lucky enough to have a farm near you even better.   They're more likely to have the twisted and funky gourds and while typically more expensive, a few of these mixed in with store bought and you're set. 

And there you go!  I've included lots of group pics for you to add design ideas to your catalog and would love to see some of your favorite faces and designs.  

48 days till Halloween....

(Quality flameless candles blending in with real candles)